Mental health

Focus on all the things in your life you have to be grateful for

I have spent most of my life being miserable, depressed and unhappy, and let me tell you one thing: it was exhausting and I hated every minute of living my life like that. So, I decided to change. I decided that I did not want to live the rest of my life that way. I wanted to be happy – dancing through the woods kind of happy.

Until very recently – pretty much around the time my boyfriend passed away – I was genuinely not a very grateful person. I did not fully appreciate the wonderful things I already had in my life. When he died something inside me started to swift. Not right away – at first I was devastated and grieving. But now, six months later, I can feel how much I have changed in the last six months. In particularly the last three months since I moved to London.

I could have gone into deep despair, bitterness, anger, depression, anxiety and a lot of other negative feelings when he died. I didn’t. I decided I wanted to live my life to the absolute fullest, be grateful, smile every day and be happy again.

This is not always easy. In fact, most of the time it is hard work – but isn’t it like that for most people? Some days I really have to force myself to smile, remind myself to give compliments to others, ask a friend how she or he is etc. Other days it comes easy. But even – no especially – on the bad days I do not give up, throw in the towel or call it a day. No, I keep fighting for the things I want the most; happiness, smiles, laughter, gratefulness, following my heart, chasing my dreams and live my life to the fullest.

Every single day from I get up in the morning until I go to bed, I do my best on focusing on all the things in my life I have to be grateful – no matter how big or small they might be. Obviously, I get sad too and I, too, sometimes get caught in a spiral of negative thoughts. But overall I do my best of focusing on the things I have to be grateful for. And it is actually quite easy once you start doing it.

I have written a list of some of the things I am grateful for so you can see for yourself it doesn’t have to be hard, and you can do it too (if I can do everyone can).

  • My mum. She is the bomb. She is always there for me. She supports me, encourages me and helps me. My mum is my biggest cheerleader, and I love her.

 

  • My dad. For always supporting and encouraging me as well. For always telling me how proud he is of me. I love you, daddy!

 

  • My wonderful friends. I might not have a ton of friends but I have a handful of really good friends who I know will always be there for me. I don’t know what I would do without them. They are my rocks!

 

  • My family here in London. They have opened their home and hearts to be and I am forever grateful for all they have done and are doing for me.

 

  • My internship. I truly could not ask for a better internship. They are the best.

 

  • The time I had with my boyfriend. I feel so grateful for having had 2,5 years with this guy, and I treasure all the wonderful memories.

 

  • I just love this city so much.

 

  • My struggles with mental illnesses. This one might sound weird but I am truly grateful for them because if I hadn’t suffered from then I wouldn’t be the person I am today, and I wouldn’t have half the wisdom and knowledge I have.

 

  • All the amazing people around this world – I might not have met them but just following them on social media, reading interviews with them etc. makes me feel grateful to know we have such incredible people in the world.

 

  • My health. Simple as that.

 

  • My life. After my boyfriend died, I have come to truly appreciate my life and my time here on this beautiful planet.

 

  • Having grown up in Denmark. Denmark is one of the most privileged, safest and happiest countries in the world, and I have come to see how lucky I am to have grown up in such a privileged country.

 

  • My travels. I have already travelled a great deal, and I feel so grateful for having the chance to see so much of the world.

 

  • Being single. Though I can never be grateful for my boyfriend passing away, I can, however, be grateful for being single on being on my own. I am learning so much about myself, and I actually enjoy it despite the missing and grieving.

 

  • Creative Grieving and Elizabeth Gilbert. This woman and her book has helped me so much in my grief journey.

 

  • Spring, flowers and sunshine. I love it!

 

  • I really do like a good cup of coffee. It makes my soul happy.

 

  • Because what would I do without all my beloved books?

 

  • This blog. I love writing here.

 

  • Cosy blankets. They are just the best. Especially with a book and a cup of coffee or tea.

 

  • This is weird. I know. But I feel so grateful for having found their amazing products. I absolutely love them! And I love the philosophy behind this brand. Basically, I love everything about this company.

 

  • My pajamas. Because they are soft, and I love wearing them.

My list of things I am grateful for is endless. I could keep this list going for pages and pages. However, I will stop here. I think my list gives you a pretty good idea of what I mean when I say I know you have something in your life to be grateful for as well. Even if it is just a cup of coffee and beautiful flowers (though I suspect you have much more to be grateful for). We all have things to be grateful. We just have to remind ourselves to see them and focus on them.

What are some things you are grateful for in your life?

Love & happiness,

Heidi

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